Open Letter #1

Dear Obese Mass-Transit Passenger,

First, let me say that I do not hate you for being obese. Perhaps you have a thyroid problem or perhaps you have made a conscious decision to prioritize the enjoyment of food over your physical well-being. Or perhaps you are the fourth South Philly man I have seen that could be 8.5 months pregnant. With twins. Whatever the case, I do not hate you for being obese.

What I really don’t like, however, is the way your eyes light up when you see me sitting alone in a two-seat bench. You seem to think that my fitting easily into my seat is permission for you to take some of my space for yourself. If you were to offer to pay me a third of my fare in exchange for using a third of my seat, I might be amenable, but flopping alarmingly down next to/on me and then saying “Excuse me” as though I had somehow trespassed upon you is not the way to make me a good neighbor.

While I realize that these transit seats were apparently not designed for Philadelphian proportions, the territory allotted for each fare-paying individual is clearly demarcated with chrome or plastic edges. Why must you overflow? In this chilly weather, are you attempting to confer unto me some of the benefits of your negligible surface-area-to-volume ratio? Thanks, but no thanks.

Please know that my primary method of avoiding you, if there is any remote chance of the bus filling up more than halfway, is to sit next to someone whose approach to commuting appears to be less than imperialistic. Even if they are obviously confused as to why I sat next to them rather than choosing an empty two-seater.

I have encountered well-mannered passengers of size who manage to keep their considerable mass to themselves, and they have my gratitude. As for the rest of you, I have bony little elbows, and I’m not afraid to use them.

xo,
Tam

You might be crazy if...

-you haven't even considered that you could be crazy.
-you can draw a perfect circle.
-you hatch a plan to die-cut your programs.

This has been a public service announcement from the bell jar.
Thank you.

...and we're back

I've been seriously slacking here, and a lot has happened in the past couple of weeks. When last I posted, I was waiting to be whisked away for bachelorette weekend at a shore house, which was 36 hours of Rock Band, karaoke, wine, cheese, tax-free outlet shopping, and movies with some of the bestest people in the world. They = awesome.


Thanksgiving was interesting as Mom agreed to give up her "& guest" (since we can't stand her lame boyfriend who is not remotely good enough for her) and I took sister-bridesmaid to take her driving test and finally get her license at 23!

This week I started a new job at the same company, so it's been pretty mentally exhausting, but on Thursday, we got our marriage license! See goofy smiles below, taken just moments after in the hallway at City Hall.


Then yesterday we made our third and final trip out to New Hope, PA to pick up Peter's wedding ring, this lovely piece by Humphrey. It's a stainless steel comfort-fit band tension set with a princess cut sapphire, and I've hidden it in with some wedding stuff, so even if I forget where it is for the next month, I will be sure to find it again.


Our RSVP deadline was also yesterday, so with the exception of my uncle who's been in and out of the hospital all year, our final guest count should be established by Tuesday at the latest, allowing for responses postmarked by the 6th.

Updated to-dos:
My dress alterations - with seamstress; final fitting scheduled.
Fiance's tux - decided conclusively
Attire for male attendants - just one open question remaining. Then guys need to get measured.
The rehearsal dinner - casual, optional, and pay-your-own way. Basically just whoever feels like eating together after the rehearsal.
Contract signing for live musicians - Will be drafted and be accompanied by deposit.
Finish learning to dance - Still no progress
Honeymoon plans (and Peter's passport) - Passport acquired, lodging in London secured, Paris apt to be secured today. Still need Eurostar tix.
Hotel rms for wedding - still need to reserve for ourselves!
Wedding bands - Both in our possession! Yay!
Ask readers to participate - 1 of 2.
Guests/tables - Will be nailed down by Tues, latest.
Reception decor (centerpieces, guestbook, card box, etc) - Still need to finish up bouquet and corsages. I'm considering scrapping the centerpieces, and I'm doing my best to outsource the guestbook and card box. Still contemplating how to do decor for the rest of the house...but that might be what happens to most of the centerpiece stuff I already have.
Programs, table numbers, and other print collateral - Started drafting program copy.
Cake - Give final flavors decision to caterer. Make cake ornaments.
Final payments still to be made to - DJ, shuttles, seamstress, tux rentals, photographer, catering

Unfortunately, I haven't been doing much crafty, lately, or I'd tell you all about it. With just under 6 weeks to go, things are truly winding down.